Excessive

I had a pretty okay sleep... it was on the border of being a NOT good sleep, but I suppose I feel rested, so it's alright. I woke up a lot... every few hours; I fell asleep listening to Tony Bennett, which actually worked pretty well considering I wasn't even tired really, and it made me fall asleep before the album was over (MTV Unplugged) which was surprising but I woke up a lot, turned it back on a few times, and eventually woke up at 7:00am and decided that I was sick of laying and waking up, and I had a headache worse than the night before, so I got up.

Everyone's complaining because I haven't updated in a long time, so I suppose I should, just so people don't start showing up at my door with weapons.

the most important problems of life are fundementally insoluble; they can never be solved, only outgrown, and one does this by accepting the problem and developing further by means of it.

I don't think I can write; I don't think I have the mind for it at the moment. I have a doctors appointment on Tuesday, perhaps after that, I'll update as to my condition.. I realize some people have been wanting an update on whats going on, so all I can say is as of right now I can't write because my mind is gone. If something changes, you'll know, because I'll write an entry, but don't expect one until tuesday.

I'm having seriously one of the worst days ever. Besides the fact that my loyal kittens have kept me company and attempted to comfort me all day, I'm laying around, yelling at the walls, shaking and hitting my head and screaming. I can't play games... I get frustrated and yell curse words at the TV before slamming down the controller and shutting off the game without saving. I can't eat because... well I'm not hungry; I can't rest because my back hurts and my mind has melted. I layed in bed floating in and out of conciousness listening to the Final Fantasy X soundtrack, having the craziest, disturbing dreams / daydreams. I feel sick to my stomach, I feel sick to my head. I feel helpless and worst of all I feel hateful. I want to go visit a few select people in person with a chainsaw. I want to cut out vocal chords, and cut off heads.. grr. Is it legal to make threats like that? meh...